2
What If
Last night, while I lay thinking here,
some Whatifs crawled inside my ear
and pranced and partied all night long
and sang their same old Whatif song:
Whatif Im dumb in school?
Whatif theyve closed the swimming pool?
Whatif I get beat up?
Whatif theres poison in my cup?
Whatif I start to cry?
Whatif I get sick and die?
Whatif I flunk that test?
Whatif green hair grows on my chest?
Whatif nobody likes me?
Whatif a bolt of lightning strikes me?
Whatif I dont grow talle?
Whatif my head starts getting smaller?
Whatif the fish wont bite?
Whatif the wind tears up my kite?
Whatif they start a war?
Whatif my parents get divorced?
Whatif the bus is late?
Whatif my teeth dont grow in straight?
Whatif I tear my pants?
Whatif I never learn to dance?
Everything seems well, and then
the nighttime Whatifs strike again!
SHAKING
Geraldine now,stop shaking that cow
For heavens sake,for yoursake and the cows sake.
Thats the dumbest way Ive seen
To make a milk shake.
BLAME
I wrote such a beautiful book for you
Bout rainbows and sunshine
And dreams that come true.
But the goat went and ate it
(You knew that he would),
So I wrote you another one
Fast as I could.
Of course it could never be
Nearly as great
As that beautiful book
That the silly goat ate.
So if you dont like
This new book I just wrote---
Blame the goat.
LONGMOBILE
Its the worlds longest car,I swear,
It reaches from Beale Street to Washington Square.
And once you get in it
To go where youre going,
You simply get out,cause youre there.
HURK
Id rather play tennis than go to the dentist.
Id rather play soccer than go to the doctor.
Id rather play Hurk than go to work.
Hurk?Hurk?Whats Hurk?
I dont know,but it must be better than work.
MUSICAL CAREER
She wanted to play the piano,
But her hands couldnt reach the keys.
When her hands could finally reach the keys,
Her feet couldnt reach the floor.
When her hands could finally reach the keys,
And her feet could reach the floor,
She didnt want to play ol piano anymore.