PART 4

EXT. USA TODAY LOADING DOCK - DAY

Mrs. Pressman continues her story to Ike.

MRS. PRESSMAN

Im not sure. Mr. Schullian runs the

newsstand, hes our local bookie, you

know, hes giving eight to one odds she

wont. He says shes so famous now,

maybe Vegas will give odds on her. Im

going to wait to hear what the pros say.

IKE

Good fact. Well, you let me know.

MRS. PRESSMAN

Oh, I will.

ANGLE ON:

Maggie indicates column to Peggy. She looks over at the part of

the shop used to wash and dye hair. Theres a sink, stool and a

cabinet affixed to the wall above sink, which holds various

shampoos and hair dyes. Maggie gets an idea. Maggie and Peggy

step forward toward Ike.

MAGGIE

Well, instead of a haircut, how about

a wash? You know, get all that city

grit out of it.

IKE

Youll answer my questions?

Maggie nods affirmatively.

IKE (contd)

(removing his jacket)

Fine. You wash, Ill ask the

questions.

PEGGY

Great.

Ike hands Peggy his jacket. A mystified Peggy leads Ike to the

sink. While she does this...

MAGGIE

Have a seat. Peggy, why dont you give

him the special treatment that

strengthens the follicles.

Ike sits in the chair near the sink. Maggie shakes out a smock

and puts it around Ike.

MAGGIE (contd)

So, what do you want to know?

Ike leans and rests his head on the sink. Peggy bends over him

and wets his hair. She grabs various hair coloring products.

IKE

Getting nervous?

MAGGIE

Nervous? Not at all! No. Ive never

been more certain in my life. Except

-- I am having all kinds of weird

dreams.

Ike pulls the cloth down from over his face.

IKE

Weird dreams? Youre going to tell me

about them?

MAGGIE

Yes.

PEGGY

(calming)

Lets just put this back here for the

aromatherapy.

Peggy recovers his face, then continues to fuss with the hair

coloring products. Maggie helps.

INT. BEAUTY PARLOR - LATER

Ike sits with a towel over his head as Peggy blow-dries the back

of his head. His back is to the mirror, his body faces Maggie.

Cindy does her own nails as Mrs. Pressman scratches off lottery

tickets. The dog, Sprout, sits in is basket.

MAGGIE

In another one...

PETE, wearing a hat, comes in the front door of the salon.

PEGGY

Hey, Pete, Ill be right with you.

Ike peeks out from under his towel as Maggie continues.

MAGGIE

Im inside the church. Everyone I know

is there, only theyre not really them.

Theyre like Frankenstein monsters, but

without the bolts coming out of their

necks. Its all very "Night of the

Living Dead". And heres the creepiest

part -- I look down at my dress and

its red. I mean, I have no idea what

it means. Reds not my color!

Ike listens intently and stares steadily into her eyes. Peggy

removes the towel. His hair is divided into equal parts and

dyed orange and red.

MAGGIE (contd)

So what do you think?

Ike stares back at her, the tickle of suspicion creeping up his

spine.

IKE

I think youd look good in red.

PEGGY

No, shes talking about your hair.

Maggie swivels his chair so that Ike faces the mirror. Ike

looks at his brightly colored hair.

MAGGIE

Youre all ready for football season,

Mr. Graham.

Ike stares at his hair in total confusion. With icy calm, Ike

rises from his chair and primps the end of his hair as if giving

it the finishing touches. Then he sees his defaced newspaper

clipping and all becomes clear. He picks up the article and

shows it to everyone. Ike does a slow burn.

IKE

Yes, I think I nailed the personality

profile of the women of Hale.

Ike turns and puts the clipping up on the mirror.

IKE (contd)

(to Peggy)

My jacket, please.

Peggy hands him his jacket.

IKE (contd)

(sarcastically)

Thank you.

Ike moves toward the door. He spots Pete.

IKE (contd)

(putting on jacket;

to Pete)

Excuse me, Pete, do you know a place

that sells shampoo... Strong shampoo?

PETE

Docs Pharmacy. Third and Elm. Tell

him Pete sent you. Want my hat?

IKE

No thanks.

Ike smiles at Maggie and exits.

MAGGIE

(to Peggy)

He seems crabby.

CUT TO:

EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY

In front of beauty salon, Maggie follows Ike out.

MAGGIE

If youre looking for Elm Street, its

that way.

She puts on her sunglasses.

IKE

Thank you.

He walks the other way.

MAGGIE

If you came down here in the pursuit of

happiness, you might as well go back.

Because you cant make me feel bad.

She stops walking and turns to Ike.

IKE

Im not here to make you feel bad. Im

here for vindication. In my heart...

MAGGIE

You have one?

Ike walks back to Maggie.

IKE

I feel Im right about you. You got me

fired, lady. You destroyed my

reputation and you screwed up my hair.

You chew men up, spit them out and

loved it. And Im down here to satisfy

myself on that point.

PASSERSBY stare at Ikes hair and giggle.

MAGGIE

Did something happen to make you care

about reality?

IKE

Yes. Conviction. Conviction that Im

onto the truth. Youre going to do the

same thing to "poor bastard number four"

that you did to the last three. Youre

going to run again. And Im not

leaving until you do.

MAGGIE

Youre going to be very disappointed.

IKE

Well see.

MAGGIE

Id love to stay and chat, but Ive got

to get back to work. I still have my

job.

He stares at her for a beat, stung by her words.

MAGGIE

I have nothing to hide, Mr. Graham.

Talk to whoever you want. You might

actually stumble upon a fact or two.

Maggie walks away. Ike walks a few steps and stops at a KID on

a bike.

IKE

Hey, kid, Ill give you ten bucks for

your hat.

Kid agrees. Ike puts the hat on and starts to cross the street.

An OLD WOMAN walks by and hits him with a newspaper. Ike is

stunned.

EXT. MAGGIES HOUSE - DUSK

Maggie pulls into the driveway in her truck. Shes in a fine

mood as she walks right in the house.

INT. MAGGIES HOUSE - DUSK

Bob, Walter, and Maggies GRANDMOTHER JULIA sit in the living

room. Grandma is sewing one of Maggies wedding veils. Walter

drinks wine, Ike wears a hat.

WALTER

You know, when I only see one dog, I

know Ive had too much to drink.

Te family dog, Skipper, sits near a ceramic dog table. Maggie

smiles as she walks in the front door and puts down her tool box

and bag.

MAGGIE

Youll never guess who came crawling

into town with his tail between his

legs.

IKE (o.s.)

Who?

Maggie enters the parlor to see Ike smiling evilly from his seat

on the couch.

IKE (contd)

(innocently)

Hello, Maggie. I just came by to

apologize to your family.

(looks to Walter)

When Im wrong, Im wrong. I pushed a

story. I made a mistake.

WALTER

In other words -- hes only human. An

he brought us a bottle of wine.

Raises the bottle to Maggie.

IKE

They made me put my hat back on.

WALTER

Oh, yeah. Scared the hell out of

Skipper.

MAGGIE

Youve got to be kidding me.

Maggie stares at them both.

BOB

(enjoying the moment)

No, no, you should have seen Skipper.

(then, imitates

growling)

It wasnt that funny.

Maggie gives him a look that says, "You are not absolved." She

smiles stiffly, looking back at Ike. She then sits on the arm

of Bobs chair and puts her arm on his shoulder.

MAGGIE

So, the forces of good and evil have

already met.

Maggie takes the wine bottle from the table next to Walter. She

snaps a look to Bob, who follows her.

BOB

Ill help you take into the kitchen.

GRANDMA JULIA

Check on the crabs, Bob.

We overhear them murmuring in annoyed tones about the wedding

plans as they exit... Walter puts down his drink.

IKE

Gee, I hope they dont have a fight out

there. You dont think theyll call it

off...?

WALTER

Well, wedding cake freezes. This we

know.

IKE

You know, your daughter seems...

Ike notices that hes been sewn to the veil.

GRANDMA JULIA

Sorry.

IKE

Thats okay, Grandma.

Grandma cuts the thread and separates the veil from Ikes sleeve.

IKE (contd)

(continuing his thought)

... Like such a lovely girl.

Walter points to a portrait painting on the wall.

WALTER

Like her mother.

IKE

(seeing the portrait)

Ah, beautiful.

(gets up to admire

the portrait)

I just cant see her leaving multiple

grooms in the dust like that.

GRANDMA JULIA

Oh, yes, you can. Shes has em all on

tape.

IKE

She has a tape?

WALTER

(good-natured)

Yeah. Lee at the hotel videos wedding.

I mean Maggie didnt know she was going

to make the hundred-yard dash.

Walter gestures to a pile of video cassettes on the bookcase.

Ike checks on the tapes.

IKE

Dads fishing trip, Grandmas knee

operation, Grandmas birthday...

WALTER

Gotta tell you this about my daughter.

My daughter makes real good time, even

in a long dress and heels. Maggie may

not be Hales longest running joke, but

she certainly is the fastest.

Walter cracks up.

GRANDMA JULIA

(sarcastically)

Ha ha.

CLOSE ON: A tape. It reads: "Maggie I, II, III." Ikes

interest is more than piqued. Ike picks it up. They get up and

go to the dining room.

DISSOLVE TO: